where is my mind?

i kind of went off my rocker a couple of weeks ago and things have been pretty much fucked up ever since. my body's here but my brain isn't. i dunno where it is actually. i'm overwhelmed by this feeling of ennui and it seems to me as though the life i knew did a 360. as a result, i did some pretty retarded things. i cannot possibly explain why i undertook those actions and i have come to woefully regret them now. it would seem as if my life's going on a downward spiral thanks to the action/reaction process due to the horrible decisions i made. i'd try make things right but its all in the past. all i can do now is apologise to certain people whom in retrospect i feel i've neglected/treated like shit/etc. i hope you know who you are. i really am sorry for being such an ass even by my standards.